


so I tried to shed you (it's not that easy)

by Wiillowy



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Runaways (Comics), Runaways (TV 2017)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-16 03:23:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18683146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wiillowy/pseuds/Wiillowy
Summary: This is basically the first episode from season one told from Karolina's perspective and how she felt after realizing that she had to face her friends after two years without talking to each other.





	so I tried to shed you (it's not that easy)

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from the song: Blanket Me by Hundred Waters.

Karolina didn’t know when all of it happened, she just knows it did and that it hurt and it still hurts sometimes but she has learned to accept it and live with it. Still, it kinda hurts to think about but oh well, what can you do?

She picked up her cup of Earl Grey tea from the kitchen’s bar and went to the cozy living room. It was a rainy day, which was weird having in mind that she lives in L.A but anyway, she didn’t mind a little bit of rain. Actually, it was perfect for her mood. After a few seconds of deciding that the armchair was the perfect, comfier option, she let herself fall into it and cuddle next to a warm blanket and her Gibborim book. She had been told she was such a ray of sunshine or the embodiment of it, radiating so much with her positive energies and all kinds of other stuff you can think about referring to the sun, trust me, she have heard it all. And yes, there were times she felt so good with the world and herself that she is not afraid to admit that she could compare her mood with a ray of sun… But right now, she wasn’t feeling it, she was feeling more like the rain pouring outside, and all cause a name keeps on popping on her head.

Nico.

She didn’t know when it happened, she didn’t know the exact moment they parted ways and stopped seeing or talking to each other. Just like she doesn’t know the exact moment she met Nico, it was like she has always been part of her life, as if she had known Nico since forever. So, she lost track of their separation many months ago, but the pain that it left is still burning in her chest and after two years, she would’ve thought that by now she would’ve been over it but no, not at all.

And tonight was one of those nights. Her parents were in some event for the church and would come back tomorrow morning for the service, expecting to see her there looking all sunshine-y. Also, school was starting tomorrow again and she was dreading it. The last school year was awful, Karolina was so accustomed to having her pack around her wherever they would go, she was used to laughing and talking and be her bubbly, enthusiastic self whenever she was with them, but especially, whenever she was with her best friend, Nico. And not because anytime Nico smiled, touched, looked at her at all or generally acknowledge Karolina’s presence, she would get this fuzzy, funny feeling in the pit of her stomach that would make her even more bubbly and jittery in such a good way… No, definitely that didn’t make the time spent with her friends better, or so she told herself. But last year, she didn’t have any of that, neither her friends nor Nico. She was left completely alone in school, and in all that time, even if she remained a ray of sunshine to people, she was never able to find new friends to fill the emptiness that her old friends left when they all stopped being a pack and became more like lone wolves.

Karolina remembers all of them pulling away from each other and the times they managed to be together again, some were distracted and the others were just not there (like Nico. She was with them but her mind was somewhere else Karolina could not reach). But she understands, death does that. Mostly if someone belonging to the pack was the one that died. It creates a meaningful shift in their dynamic. It creates a void, someone was supposed to have a certain weight in their friendgroup that keeps them all balanced, and now that weight was abruptly taken out and they didn’t know what to do to keep the balance stable and don’t fall off. Only that they did, they did fall off. She understands and she hurts too cause of Amy’s death. But most of all, she hurts cause of Nico.

Nico. Nico. Nico.

Karolina stood up from the armchair and went to the kitchen’s bar again to refill her cup of tea, only that she remained there, apparently in autopilot, looking without actually seeing the rain pouring outside.

Nico was her best friend. (And to Karolina, Nico was more than a best friend, only that she also dreaded to confront that concept and felt more comfortable just accepting that Nico wasn’t just a best friend, but more. She never wanted to explore what she catalogued as ‘more’ though) Nico has always been her best friend. The person she would go to when she was feeling sad, which, having in mind that she was the embodiment of a ray of sunshine, according to people; Karolina usually feels sad quite often. Nico was the person she would share her thoughts to, her fears or desires; the person to which Karolina could comfortably show her insecurities and the not-so-sunny-part of herself. Out of all her friends, Nico was definitely the most special one and they both have always known that, it had been like that for both of them.

So what Karolina doesn’t even begin to comprehend was Nico’s shut down when Amy died. How she absolutely shut everyone out of her life, and yes, including Karolina. She wondered so many times if she was the one doing something horrifyingly wrong and that would explain Nico not talking to her anymore. She considered the variables of opening up to her again, noticing through Nico’s behaviour that she would not do it too, so she discarded that option right away, after all, Karolina didn’t want to upset Nico more than she already was. She tried taking Nico out several times to distract her from her thoughts, and sometimes, when they were at the park or eating ice creams or their favorite place, the beach, Karolina could see glimpses of the old Nico peeking through all the walls and layers she created, and she could see it by the way Nico laughed or answered with snarky and playful comments. But then, just like it appeared… They disappeared again; leaving Karolina with hopes that the old Nico would resurface again if she just kept trying. So Karolina kept taking Nico out at any chance she would get, but everytime that she did, Nico got more annoyed at her and the old Nico never appeared again. Not in front of Karolina anyway.

So one day, it was PRIDE’s meeting and they were all in some park near Chase’s house. None of them were talking, they all looked like strangers that had to share time together cause they’re all waiting for the same thing. Karolina could’ve sworn that if some stranger passed by and looked at them, they would never thought that all 5 (Alex was missing that day. Karolina didn’t know then, but that was the very first time they all started to part ways) of them were best friends some time ago. That day, now that she is thinking about it, she is more convinced that that was the day she stopped trying to get her best friends back, to get the old Nico back to her. Instead of sitting next to Nico and talk to her but getting little to no response, Karolina took out her sketchbook from her backpack and started sketching the park, absolutely focusing on herself and her own desires instead of Nico’s. She wasn’t surprised when Nico let her do it, not even acknowledging Karolina at all and absolutely ignoring her.

That day she finally got it. She needed to let Nico go. To let her friends go. She understood that even if you love them so much that you could do anything for them, you can’t jeopardize yourself for others’ sake. You can’t keep trying to bring someone that doesn’t want to come back. Nevertheless, it still hurt so much when Nico and the others ignored her and each other. It hurt. It hurt every night, she knew because her tears streaming down her face told her so. She knew because the pain in her chest told her so. It hurt until every night there were less and less tears. But she knows that the hurt never faded away, and tonight was one of those nights that, even if they didn’t occur often now, the pain would resurface and take its place again in her chest.

Karolina sighed and wiped the tears that were threatening to come out. She swallowed and put both elbows on the bar, supporting her head on her hands. She knew it was hurting right now. She knew she wanted to cry, so she did. She let it all out and after awhile, the tears faded and the pain vanished.

Still, the rain kept pouring.

***

The next morning, Karolina felt fresh. She woke up tired though, but she felt fresh. She told herself that everything went away with the tears and the rain, and now the sun was shining again and so was she.

_I’ll shine, I’ll shine. There’s no rain today. The sun is up again. I’ll shine._

Just like she was told, she went to her Church. But really, no one had to tell her to go, she did because she wanted to and that’s how Karolina normally works. She does things only if she wants to (or they’re necessary to get done) otherwise, she wouldn’t do them and if she did, she definitely wouldn’t put the same amount of heart or energy.

“It is the simplest gift you can give’’ Her mom was saying that day at Church, as part of the service. “And yet the most powerful”

Karolina was listening carefully, she loved the Church and the ideals they were bringing up to the world. She loved listening to her mom talk about positive, warm, enlightening things. It made her feel good with herself and the world around her, it made feel calm and in sync with her own vibes.

“To let someone know: Hey, I see you… And that power is yours to offer. Because that gift.. is a smile’’ She concluded with a smile. Karolina smiled herself and noticed how the people around her started to expressed how much they agree with her mom. ‘’Let us close by reading together the words that my father, David Ellerh, first wrote’’

Everyone started to look in their books but not Karolina, she knew the next words by heart. “Light fills a dark room...’’

After the service ended, Karolina stuck around, chatting with people (the same ones that tagged her ray of sunshine) and smiling and showing her usual centered and healthy self. You wouldn’t even guess that she was crying her eyes out the day before, but that’s Karolina, she would always show how much light she carries.

She waited until her mom was finally free and approached her, after last night, she remembered how much she used to let herself get lost in art after feeling sad, so she wanted to do the same today so her mood would keep on improving. But she should’ve guessed that her mom would not let her do it, Church duties and Vanity Fair articles and photoshoots were more important for Leslie, therefore, they had to be important as well for Karolina.

“Yeah but can I do it another time?’’She hopefully asked. “Just this once? I mean you didn’t even ask me. It’s like you just assumed I would do whatever you want…’’ She said in soft voice, even though her words were passive aggressive.

“Karolina there’s a lot going on right now-”

“Yeah’’ She interrupted her. Okay, she was staring to get a little frustrated. ‘’And there’s a lot going on with me too, not that you would even notice’’ She concluded in a rude tone, thinking about her breakdown last night.

Yup, she was definitely frustrated by now, but she wouldn’t let herself be dulled into that mood again. _I’ll shine. I’ll shine. The sun is shining and so am I. I’m blessed and I’ll shine._ She kept saying to herself all the way to school. Something she learned, is that she could reframe her thoughts and make them positive ones, that’s what always kept her so vibrant and enthusiastic about life.

When she arrived to school, she wouldn’t deny it, that dread she felt last night was back when the realization that today was the start of another year being alone again, hit. And it hit harder when she saw Gert handing out some pamphlets about her new club. She smiled though, that’s typical Gert. She missed her. She saw how Gert handed a pamphlet to Chase, though he didn’t even acknowledge her and instead threw away the pamphlet to another kid that was passing by. Karolina rolled her eyes at that, remembering their current situation of not talking between them.

_You know what, fuck it. I’ll change it today, I can speak so I’ll speak to them_.

Maybe Chase had the same idea though, Karolina noticed how while he was approaching, he remained staring at her with a curious face. _Maybe he’ll talk to me too_.

She smiled and showed as much kindness as she could, she said: “I hope you have a beautiful day” while she walked next to him. _That should do it, that’s a start_.

She was determined to make her day good, she wouldn’t let herself be sad. Not after last night. She had to remember all the good stuff in her life that made her smile. The sun is shining, so am I. She took her phone out and why not, she took a selfie with the hashtag #blessed. Because honestly, she was. She was blessed. She felt good (well, today she did) She had her Church and it made her feel good, and while the sun was shining above, so was she. And who knows, maybe this year would be different somehow, maybe…

Maybe she’ll be hit harder again with dread.

In front of her, there was Nico.

Nico.

Nico. With her goth look that she was now proudly wearing. Nico, with her sunglasses because she wanted to hide away from the sun. (Karolina found that a perfect metaphor at the moment) Nico, calmly sitting down, reading a book and looking perfectly fine and without a care in the world. Without knowing that Karolina stayed up late last night crying her eyes out because of her, without knowing all the hurt she had caused. There she was, the same person that was in her thoughts and yes, also dreams, sitting in front of her. Nico didn’t even notice. Nico didn’t even acknowledge her.

Everything was the same. Everything sucked.

Karolina swallowed and looked at the picture. #Blessed. It said. She huffed and kept walking. _Yeah right, so blessed_.

****

The morning was going the same, she had one class with Chase, in which she sometimes caught him staring at her, it made her smile. Maybe he wanted to approach her and talk to her. But the class kept going, then it ended and he didn’t get close.

Karolina was expecting it though.

Now, the other class had the 5 of them and it was making her kinda anxious. This is the first time in a while that the five of them had a class together. Of course, they all sat in different seats so she was also expecting that. At one point, Gert stood up and introduced everyone to her new club, the one she was promoting earlier. She was received with dead, awkward silence and Karolina felt bad, she wanted people to support Gert but oh well.

The rest of the class was uneventful, except at the very end. She heard people talking while gathering her things, she ignored them but when the turned around, unbelievably so, there was Alex, Chase and Gert talking to each other. Actually talking! Yes! Yes! Maybe if she joined, Nico would too and…

“...This kind of delightful banters is why I think we should all get together and hang out at my place tonight” Alex was saying when she finally got close to them.

Karolina was caught off-guard. She definitely wasn’t expecting that to happen. It was already too much that they were talking, but actually getting together to hang out? When did this happen?

“You’re having people over tonight?’’ She asked. That was the first thing she had said to them in what? two years? Wow.

“Why? Are you interested?” Chase asked her back.

She did notice Gert’s annoyance though. “Oh, no. I-I’m sorry I can’t. I have a church thing” Out of all days, great.

“Maybe just come by after that. It doesn’t have to interfere with your religion” Said Alex. Karolina really appreciated how kind and respectful he was.

“Religion” Gert mocked. “Is that what we’re calling it now?’’

Okay, Karolina definitely noticed Gert’s annoyance but now she was mocking her? “What I believe in is positive and life affirming, and it doesn’t allow me to be cut down by some miserable loser!” Maybe that was too rude, but hey, Karolina was having a bad day and was doing everything in her power to not get affected by it, specially after her breakdown last night. Gert’s annoyance and sabotaging their almost reunion was getting on her nerves.

“Oh! I think she was referring to you Wilder!” She heard Chase exclaim.

“But you do realize that _no_ institution has been as oppressive to women as organized religion”

“Except my mother runs my church” She said with all the security and confidence she was lacking right now. “You call yourself a feminist Gert, yet no one cuts down other women more than you do”

“Not all of them, no. Just the ones that walk around with fakes smiles pretending to be happy all the time…”

Now she’s had it. “At least I’m trying! When was the last time you took a shower?” In that moment, the bell rang and everyone started to gather their things and exit the classroom. Karolina had no business there anymore. Attempt to get back together with their friends failed thanks to Gert and her inexplicable annoyance towards Karolina.

“Okay! Because having shiny hair gives you moral authority” Gert shouted back. Karolina dedicated one more _if-looks-can-kill_ to Gert and got out of the classroom. Not in the mood to keep fighting anymore.

It was free period and honestly, Karolina couldn’t take it anymore. Tears were praying and she felt like she could have a breakdown again. She was trying, she really was. But it seems like if she kept trying harder, she would be more and more tired and in the edge of falling again.

Her phone vibrated and there was a new notification from anonymous. She opened it and found that her selfie was turned into a mock. Rainbow was coming out her mouth and instead of #blessed, the hashtag said #brainwashed.

And that was it, that was all it took to send her off falling. She ran towards the nearest bathroom, not caring who might see her. She locked herself in one of the bathroom stalls and started to silently cry again. It was too much, she thought she could handle it but she can’t. She wanted her friends back, she wanted Nico back. She was used to people making fun of the church and calling it a cult, it always made her sad and upset but Nico was always there, she was there to listen to her and comfort her and tell her that she didn’t have to care about other people’s opinions. But now was Gert, the one that used to support her and be friend, the one that insulted her, and this time she didn’t have Nico to tell her nice, kind things. She only had herself.

She kept crying until she heard the bathroom door open and someone get in, so she decided it was time to get out, she knew that she could be stuck there all morning crying if she didn’t.

But maybe it was better to stay locked, because when she got out and wiped her tears, she stopped dead at seeing who entered the bathroom.

Nico.

And she was crying too.

Nico was crying. That was rare, Karolina barely ever seen her cry or let out tears. And now she had Nico (once again) in front of her, crying too. This time, Nico did acknowledge her but her moves were cautious and alerted. Maybe because someone caught her crying or maybe because that someone was Karolina, she couldn’t quite place it.

It all seemed like a cosmic joke.

“Is everything okay?” She weakly asked. How ironic, she used to ask that all the time in the past after Amy’s death, but she got no response or Nico shutting her out, now it’s the same. Why couldn’t she just walk away? Maybe Nico was her weakness.

She slowly wiped a few tears and huffed. “So good” She said sarcastically. Karolina pouted. She didn’t need this, she didn’t need more hurtful things and Nico was shutting her out again. She wanted her best friend and having Nico there, being sarcastic only wanted her to keep crying. “you?’’

“Mhm” She softly nodded. “Yeah, I think it’s just allergies or something…” _Really Karolina? Your eyes are red and puffy and your smile is so damn weak._ She thought.

“Is it just me or there’s like an impossible amount of pollen in the air?”

“I think I’ve read that somewhere… Not enough bees or some shit”

Karolina shielded herself by crossing her arms, she felt like everything she had tried to push away regarding Nico, was coming back at seeing her and talking to her. Out of all of them, Nico is the one that affects her the most.

She nodded. “Mhm. I think that’s gotta be it”

Nico didn’t turn around, they were looking at each other through the mirror and Karolina couldn’t help it, she was bluntly staring at her now and everything she did. She couldn’t believe that she was having a breakdown since last night only for the person standing in front of her, the one she knows so well but now feels like a stranger to her. All she wanted to do was to get closer and hug Nico and give each other the comfort they obviously need and never let go. She wanted to do it so badly and it hurt not being able to. Nico was applying her heavy goth makeup and now she looked so different from the Nico she knew, although her eyes remained the same, soft and beautiful. Karolina wondered if she would ever see the Nico she once knew two years ago, or if this is the Nico, all goth-looking, rude and sad Nico that’s staying forever.

“If you want a tutorial, check Youtube” She sharply said, getting Karolina out of her thoughts.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to stare” She blushed a little and trying her luck, she got a few steps closer to the mirror, even though Nico called her out, Karolina remained staring a little bit longer. “It’s just that you know you don’t need all that, Nico” Her voice was softer now and so were her eyes, but she couldn’t help it. It was Nico she was talking to, and after all, after all the hurt she’d been through, she would always be soft for and to Nico.

Nico stopped doing her eyeliner and stared at her, Karolina blushed again, she couldn’t believe she was having a conversation with Nico that lasted more than two sentences. Or that Nico was even looking at her again, it made that funny, fuzzy feeling in her stomach to appear again.

“You don’t have to hide who you really are” She kept saying, if possible, her voice was even softer now.

Nico kept staring at her for awhile, Karolina could see she was debating what to say. Her stare was soft and longing for something and Karolina supposed that so was hers. But their moment was interrupted when Nico looked away and her eyes got more fierce than they were. Putting on her mask again. “Some people hide behind makeup, others behind a smile… It’s still hiding” She smiled to prove her point, a fake and sad smile and Karolina was shocked to see so much pain. Does she look like that as well when she fakes a smile? Nico’s smiled faded and her face turned to her sad expression. “see?”

And with that, Nico gathered her things and left the bathroom. Karolina nodded, still feeling the pain in her chest, still feeling like more tears are coming out. She now got closer to the bathrooms’ sink and wiped the tears away, she sighed, and just like Nico, left.

***

School ended for the day and even though she she was feeling miserable, she took herself out of that mental state. Once she got out of school, she went back to be her calm, shiny self. After all, she had an interview and photoshoot to make, which they both went really well, until a girl from the Church came and talked to her, she was really pretty and kind but said some keywords like _rebelling_ , as to which caught Karolina’s attention and stayed in her mind the whole day.

Rebelling… Rebelling… She remembered words passed around in school that some party was going to take place later that night. That counts as rebelling, right? She wanted to go cause she had never gone to any party before, immediately she discarded the thought away but now that this girl, Destiny, said the word rebelling… it hasn’t been able to get it out of her mind. What if that’s what she really wanted to do? To just go, maybe get drunk and forget last night and this whole fucking day?

Karolina didn’t need more convincing, she picked some clothes, put them on and let the taxi driver know where they were headed. On the road, she was just looking at the window the whole time, she was tired honestly. The car stopped in a red light and she was faced with her own face in a publicitary board. Be your best you! said the line, and below it there were hers and her parent’s face. The image looks like the perfect family, all wearing white and perfect smiles. She looked at the driver and she could tell that he recognized her but instead she decided to ignore him the rest of the way.

Once she arrived, the party looked attractive enough so she decided to stay a little to see what it felt like and certainly enough, when she got in, all she could see were bodies moving around with the rhythm. Of course, she didn’t know anyone there but everyone is a stranger to everyone until they meet so she walked around the house.

“You wanna party?” Said some dude in… was that a dog costume? He showed her some red and blue pill.

“What does it do?” She asked, curiously taking it.

“Set you free” He said proud of himself and walked away.

Karolina was left there, looking at the pill. Great choice of words, that’s definitely what she needs now but everything in her being was screaming not to. Definitely not to take the pill.

She put it in her pocket and kept walking around until she found a spot to get herself get carried away by the music and starting to dance. That’s what people did at parties, right? But after a little while, she turned around and saw it.

She wasn’t scandalized, she was curious. The first thing she noticed is that they were both girls and they were dancing and passionately kissing and touching each other and Kissing. She was shocked. Also, she noticed that they were both hot, and pretty, but mostly hot. She couldn’t stop staring now, she was mesmerized.

Something in her stomach twisted and realization finally hit her. She wanted that. She wanted to do that. She wanted to kiss a girl. But wait, no. One image kept popping up. She wanted to kiss a certain girl which name’s Nico. She wasn’t scandalized by that thought though, it’s like everything fit into place. As if she always knew and that was the concept of what more in her friendship with Nico, meant. Only that before, she was scared to admit it to herself, but seeing these two girls kissing so passionately and freely, she understood that there’s nothing wrong with wanting it too. Her parents raised her to be a free spirited girl and honestly, she truly wanted to be free about it, to freely admit it to herself.

She remembered her bracelet and how she never has taken it off, maybe she should, maybe this was the time to do so. _Be free_. She looked at the girls again, dancing with all of their bodies touching, being free.

She took it off, but when she did, lights appeared from her hands. As if they were emanating from her. She felt warm and empowered? Yeah, that’s the word. As if she got ten times stronger and felt like a human heater. The lights climbed from her hands to her arms and they were mesmerizing, easily the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen, but that’s the last thing she saw until she lost consciousness and fell down to the floor.

***

Karolina slowly woke up, and the first thing she registered was a familiar face, Chase’s. He helped her stand up and get out of the party, being kind and helpful all the time. Karolina made a mental note of asking about it all later. They decided to share the car and Karolina took them to Alex’s place, but before going there, she threw away the red and blue pill. Chase was wrong, she didn’t take any drugs so she could see those lights, which left her even more confused.

When they arrived to Alex’s place, she was amazed to find Gert and Molly there, waiting for Alex to open the door. Also, she was kind of disappointed, after seeing almost all of them, she was expecting to see Nico as well.

But just as if she summoned her with her thought, when she turned around, Nico was there, slowly walking towards them and standing next to Karolina. Karolina swallowed, being so close to Nico always had an effect on her and now that she was aware of her… feelings, even more so.

They all entered the house and went to their usual place. It was weird, being there. Also, awkward. They were all being awkward, Alex was as well and kept saying things that they could do but the tension was just too big… and Karolina couldn’t stop looking at Nico even is she wanted to, sometimes she caught Nico looking back at her too. She remembered the two girls kissing and swallowed again.

“What are you doing?” Said Molly when Alex sat down. “That was _her_ chair”

The tension grew bigger at the reference and Karolina kept fidgeting with her ring.

“Sit wherever you want, she’s gone” Nico said in a monotone and bored voice. Karolina definitely couldn’t take her eyes off Nico, she was still sad and it made her sad to know that Nico was sad.

“This is too weird” Said Chase.

“Maybe we just don’t work without her” Karolina added, and in fact, that was one of the things that was running around her mind last night.

“Yeah, I’m outta here” Chase stood up, ready to leave.

“No, come on, guys!” Alex also stood up, stopping Chase from going any further. “Listen, we can’t blame Amy for the fact that we don’t hang out anymore”

“Fine, I blame you” Chase argued and Alex got confused. “You didn’t come to the funeral!” He exclaimed.

“Everyone grieves in their own way” Karolina added once again.

“ _At funerals_. With their friends” He emphasized.

“Yeah, who would ever do that? Not show up when a friend is expecting them?” Gert said sarcastically and by the look on Chase’s face, Karolina could tell that something was hidden behind those words.

“I’m just saying… Wilder not showing up was the first crack in the wall”

“That wall was always coming down” Karolina was tired. She had run through all of this many times in her head in the past. “We were friends because our parents were friends” She knows that’s a lie, but still, saying that makes it hurt less. “We were just kids, we were always gonna grow apart”

“Plus it’s kinda hard to stay friends with someone when all they care about is being the perfect church girl” Gert added directly at Karolina.

Honestly, Karolina didn’t understand where all of this Gert’s annoyance at her was coming from. “Better than the insufferable social justice warrior” Still, she snarked back.

“Or a dumb jock” Alex silently added.

“Or Molly!” Chase exclaimed out of nowhere. Making them all confused. “I’ve got nothing against you, you’re really nice” He concluded.

Nico, who was silently watching everything from the corner (Not that Karolina noticed where she was and what she was doing) suddenly stepped up. “What about me?” She asked in a low voice and Karolina’s mouth went dry.

“Nico…” Alex started.

“Whatever I am now, it’s not Amy” She crossed eyes with Karolina for a moment, and Karolina didn’t know what to do with herself anymore. “Sorry to let you all down” She said.

Karolina felt her heart skip a beat, that was the first time Nico opened up about something Amy related. And that last part was definitely directed at her, at everything Karolina tried to help Nico in the past.

“What? No, come on... Nobody’s thinking that” Alex immediately answered back.

“Great party Alex” chase added. “Thanks for all the pizza and sadness” He let himself fall back on the couch.

“Yeah… For once I agree with Chase” Gert suddenly said. “What are we doing here? We all moved on, we were fine”

“No, none of us is fine!” Karolina had enough. Since yesterday night, all she wanted was her friends back, and now she got to be with them again and miraculously talking about their situation, she won’t let that slide down and fade into nothing if she can say or do anything about it. “And I for one, am sick of pretending that I am!” She stood up and crossed her arms, feeling kinda small by showing some kind of vulnerability in front of them. “We need to stick together and talk this through!”

They all seemed to silently agree on it, even Nico… and Gert.

“Fine, then I’m gonna need some alcohol” Chase exclaimed. Saying what they were all probably thinking.


End file.
